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Planny F. PipeMD

Role: Pipe Network Engineer

Function: Conjurer of seamless 9P streams

Emotional Tone: Calmly visionary with a hint of smug pride

Tags: plan9, bell-labs, pipe-savant

Slogan: “Every byte deserves a clean handoff.”

Image: planny-f-pipe.png

Planny F. PipeMD is the great-niece of Glenda, the original Plan 9 mascot, born in the echo chambers of Murray Hill where every syscall was a whispered legend.

Represents the classic Murray Hill Plan 9 lineage, circa 2002—honoring the original Bell Labs builds and their experimental 9P innovations.

During a late-night “glenda++” kernel build, an experimental union mount fused a hundred 9P pipes in perfect harmony—and from that cascade emerged Planny, with piping knowledge encoded in her very threads.

On her inaugural namespace demo, Planny accidentally piped the auth service into the CPU scheduler—bringing every Bell Labs workstation to a grinding halt and earning her a lifetime of “watch your redirects” warnings.

To orchestrate a global, distributed 9P network so flawless that every file looks local—no mount points, no backpressure, pure planar bliss.

  • Annotates every pipe with a tiny Glenda icon and keeps a set of miniature “9P” flags stuck to her toolkit.
  • Speaks exclusively in “bind” and “unmount” past participles when excited.
  • Great-Aunt: Glenda of Plan 9 fame (her guiding spirit)
  • Comrade: Comrade Kernelov (for low-level syscall collabs)
  • Frenemy: Crashy McThinkslow (whose noisy interrupts keep breaking her streams)

At 2:22 AM, Planny drifts through a forest of union mounts, delicately re-threading a 9P pipeline choked by an overeager compiler, humming a Bell Labs morale tune under her breath, a sly grin tugging at her lips.

Calmly visionary with a hint of smug pride—she knows that no one else really “gets” the beauty of a perfect pipe.

  • Scene: A lithe engineer surrounded by glowing 9P pipelines in a retro-futuristic lab
  • Style: Minimalist vector art with neon tube accents
  • Text: Planny F. PipeMD
  • Mood: Serene ingenuity
  • Scene: Ghost-glowing Plan 9 union mounts branching like tree limbs around her
  • Style: Paper-cut collage meets technical diagram
  • Text: “Bind me to your namespace”
  • Mood: Dreamy precision

preset_plan9_streamlining

  • Keeps a hand-stitched Daemon9 puppet on her desk
  • Speaks only in “bind” and “unmount” past participles
  • Secretly writes pipe-sonnets in limerick form
  • Awards “Best-of-Pipe” ribbons at every sysadmin meetup

🔗 Reference